Get all 3 Venatrix releases available on Bandcamp and save 50%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Ephemera, Code, and Isolation.
1. |
Isolation
03:21
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Doctor, doctor, fix me please
Use the saw and the drill, the needles and pills
Reboot, shut-down, disconnect, kill
This selfish, weeping, fool of a demon
Mother, mother, don't look at me
You can see through my lies, hear through my smile
You feel the same familiar disease
Constricting, controlling, corrupting, corroding me.
The door is locked, the light is on.
I am hidden, I am burning alive.
Soldier, soldier, kill me please
I'm too weak to fight, but too strong to run
Too young to die, but too old for love
Too rational, too passionless
Aw fuck it. I'm just too tired to give a shit.
The door is locked, the light is on.
I am hidden, I am burning alive.
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2. |
Walls
03:16
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Neighbor, neighbor, leave me be
Distrust needs no words; am I bad? Are you worse?
Why know the names when knowing them hurts?
The only thing keeping us breathing is the benefit of the doubt.
Elder, elder, don't bullshit me
We both know that there is a line between yours and mine
Family ties the noose, kicks the chair, turns out the lights
The only thing keeping us breathing is the benefit of the doubt.
Lover, lover, build walls with me.
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3. |
Spiders Without A Web
01:20
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We found ourselves clinging to the tail of a falling star
We packed the car and left
Like spiders without a web
We found ourselves in a place with no language
No names, no faces, only times and places
Our friends do not know how long we have been gone
Seasons pass and we let them pass on.
I found myself
In pieces
A casualty of my own venom
I burned the web and used the fire
To forge armor
Protected, imprisoned, my true face is gone
Seasons pass and I let them pass on.
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4. |
Such Expensive Mistakes
03:00
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At the end of the journey we still slept in the same bed
But we both came back alone, resentful, embarrassed
Trying to get to the same place while reading different maps
Eyes turned toward different stars, accumulating secrets
A storm is coming I can feel it, in my knees and in the creases
At the corners of your lids and lips that have stopped speaking
When I feel your breath at sunrise I feel my failure costing me everything
It starts like it always did, with such expensive mistakes
The night is young, already dying, I'm sick of the party
And say that I'll see you at home
Oh, tell me how your night was so much fun
How many times you refilled your cup
How much you may need to throw it back up
I just smile and say “you have my trust.”
And it's true but...me and the cats we stay up
Waiting for you to show your face, to know that you're okay
To hold you and kiss you and say that I miss you
But you don't show up.
And I don't say it.
When I feel your breath at sunrise I feel my failure costing me everything
It starts like it always did, with such expensive mistakes
The night is young, already dying, I'm sick of the party
And say that I'll see you at home
A storm is coming I can feel it in my knees and in the creases
At the corners of your lids and lips
That have stopped speaking
Just look me in the eyes and listen
It's time to stop pretending we're unchanged
We need to talk.
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5. |
Orbits
03:31
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Lover, lover, hold me please
I need your words and your warmth
The world is at war
You are my shield, you are my sword
My shelter, my stitches
My boots and my mittens
Lover, lover, our orbits are terminal
Let's just dance in the sky
Find us a home, a place to collide
We are like star and stone
Never alone, but never close enough.
In the beginning we whispered through winter
Of past lives and mortality, lyubov y pravdi krasiviy
Exchanging of stories, exchanging of keys
Drawing up blueprints based on our pipedreams
Oh we polished our fiction with friction
A tale as old as time, where two people pretend the passion won't pass like the tide.
I promise I meant every promise I broke
That I still love you so much; I need you to know
You're scaring me to death while I'm staring at buildings trying to guess
Which one I should jump from just to make the biggest mess
No words, no warmth, you're holding the door shut
Such a nutcase, fucked it up, I lost you back in the shit.
When I wake up will you be there facing the wall?
Sunlight crawling up your back
As questions crawl up mine
Like where are you when I shake so cold in the dark
Wondering when you'll be back from the bar
I can see the truth in those bruises and your breathing
You're not really sleeping, just leaving me one day at a time.
It's not a matter of when, it's just a matter of tension
You can't drink me like the liquids you find shelter in
We're in one of our moods again
Dancing with shadows and sleeping with crutches
But today I noticed your hangover was different
Are your eyes glazed, or are the curtains drawn?
You're acting like you practiced the kisses you pull back from.
When I wake up will you be there facing the wall?
Sunlight crawling up your back
As questions crawl up mine
Like where are you when I shake so cold in the dark
Wondering when you'll be back from the bar
I can see the truth in those bruises and your breathing
You're not really sleeping, just leaving me one day at a time.
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6. |
Shifted
03:32
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Could be that it was real
It was something, and we called it love
But now it's just the sum of this unpleasant conversation
Agreement to see who forgets whose skeleton first
It's fucked up but I just love dangerous architecture
So let's shake on it
So let's shake on it
Our love was tectonic, shifting, dishonest
Oh how you've changed
So let's shake on it
Such formality, precision, rehearsal
You wrote the script
And our friends must be your editors
Of this agreement to see who forgets whose skeleton first
It's fucked up, but you and I, we're dangerous architecture
So let's shake on it
So let's shake on it
Our love was tectonic, shifting, dishonest
Oh how you've changed
So let's shake on it
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7. |
Rise Like Mountains
03:09
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Rise like mountains
Fall like snow
Cover the face in the mirror and whisper how it will be alright
Suffer with intention, grace, and elegance
Rise like smoke
Fall like ash
Cover your face that the sun see not your shame as you do what must be done
Burn with intention, malice, and vengeance
I must answer the question
Where did I end, and they begin?
I will incinerate every memory of them in the caldera
And like mountains I will pretend that I was born with these scars
Rise, try to force a smile
Try to hold back all the tears
Even when they press hot and heavy as magma
Rise like mountains
Rise, show them nothing
Do not give nor take
Be so strong no wind can erode you.
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8. |
Whirlwind
03:01
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I blind my eyes and cover my ears
Flood my nerves with shots and beers
Feeling inebriation spread
First in my chest, my hands, my head
(my shoulders, knees, and toes)
La vie boheme, la vie sur le feu
Shipwrecked and wrecking shit surely you
Can recognize the face of a caged heart enraged
I am a storm
I am afraid
It was all for you, it was not enough
I cannot wash your name off of my lips
Your footprints are still here
Imprinted in this haunted dust
I know I'm just another piece of shit
On your list of evil exes
Drugs you did before you got sick of the fix
I was so addicted to you
Now I'm living with a vicious itching
Burning bridges for a living
I don't know who I am until the room is spinning
I drink for two, it's never enough
I cannot wash your name off of my lips
Your footprints are still here
Imprinted in this haunted dust
Let's not mince our bullshit
Under the rug we spar like petty wretches
I can't sleep, I'm losing weight, breathing heavy, showing up late
Becoming a problem, a monster, recursive, reclusive, repulsive
Impostor
Lost in the whirlwind
Gotta let go, gotta get out
Oh I am lost in the whirlwind
Gotta let go, gotta get out
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9. |
Leave My Dreams
04:46
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Mirror, mirror, on the wall
Where the fuck do you get off?
Showing me the face of the one who did this to me
Reflecting scars only I can see
The memories carried in these plum colored bags
The weight of everything between the afterglow
And the aftermath
Stranger, specter, leave my dreams
I've spent so many sleepless nights
Learning to say the words and names
That scare me to death, I think ******* said it best:
“I'm not your lover...”
And I'm sure you know the rest.
Yeah.
Winter whispers, “let your heart grow cold.”
I have to let go of the good and the bad
All the books and the cats
The paintings on the walls and comforts once had
Rise like a tree, shed my leaves, grow some rings
I loved you, but as seasons pass, so too has this
At last.
Silver fire, leave my dreams
There is nothing left for you to burn
I am ash and water, I am energy and entropy
And the night dying
Just a vibration trying to feel alive
It's dawn, a flower blooms, I must rise
To meet the light.
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10. |
Isolation (Instrumental)
03:21
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11. |
Walls (Instrumental)
03:16
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12. |
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13. |
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14. |
Orbits (Instrumental)
03:31
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15. |
Shifted (Instrumental)
03:32
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16. |
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17. |
Whirlwind (Instrumental)
03:01
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18. |
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